Can I confess something to you?
I’m so tired of wine mom memes.
As women, I feel like they set us back 50 years.
Back in the 1960s, Valium was dubbed ‘Mother’s Little Helper’ – a drug predominantly prescribed by males to manager their anxiety.
Valium may not be socially acceptable these days, but Mommy still has a special helper, and it can be just as addictive and deadly.
If you love your wine, this is by no means a judgement on you. You do you!!!
In my case, one glass usually leads to…
~ drinking the entire bottle,
~ to my husband having to hide alcohol from me in the basement (at first I thought he was the one with the problem),
~ to making reckless decisions,
~ to being unproductive
~ to horrendous hangovers
~ to harming my physical and mental health
~ to being a shitty mom, human, wife or friend
~ to hating myself.
I know I can’t be the only one.
Caring for your baby, toddler or child can be really stressful Trust me, I know. I had two babies under two years. I was that mom drinking chardonnay from a water bottle at the playground, hosting parties, dancing on my kitchen table, dreading any sort of event or occasion that didn’t involve my favourite vice.
I couldn’t wait until my kids fell asleep so I could unwind, often rushing through bedtime and skipping snuggles or a story. So many special moments and memories lost.
I kept reading all these self-help books on finding happiness, but could never get there. I had no idea that my ‘numbing solution’ was working a little too well… until it stopped. I also felt oddly young for my age. All the other moms around me seemed like real ‘grown ups,’ while I felt like a 13-year-old stuck in a 30-something shell.
In a few short years my drinking went from recreational to reckless. But nobody noticed.
And if they did, they likely gave me a break.
After all, us moms are encouraged to seek solace in wine.
It’s how friendships are formed at the playground, it’s how moms can escape without having to leave their house, it’s how many claim they survive parenthood ‘just one sip at a time.’
It’s also how families are destroyed, lives are lost, souls are crushed and special moments are forgotten.
It took me awhile to recognize that I had a problem and to reach out for help. I was embarrassed and terrified of being viewed as a bad mom. Turns out speaking up is how I found a tribe of incredibly inspiring, sober bad ass women.
We’re constantly being told to ‘drink up’ and when it gets out of control to ‘shut up.’
We’ll I’m tired of staying silent.
Before you share that next wine meme, remember there’s a good chance you have a mom or two on your friends list who is genuinely struggling to keep it together, especially during this pandemic where stresses are through the roof and liquor sales are at an all-time high.
Please share and stop the Wine Mom movement. It’s a reckless marketing tactic that needs to end.
~ Kristyl XO
Need Help with your drinking?
Struggling and not sure where to go for help? Here are some great resources to check out: